Remembering to Breathe

Every year we return to South Carolina, it feels a lot like we're going home.  It's a place that's etched itself into my heart, and all my childhood memories.

In some ways, I feel like I grew up on the beach, among the wild things that burrowed in the sand, dampened by the salt-spray.

There was "the year of the seaweed", when hurricane surges had stirred up the depths and washed color on the sand.

There was the year we bought peaches and watermelons from the local farmer's market.

That one time in 2015 we were there during the hortific flooding that washed out roads and railroad tracks.  We drove our 12-passenger van through water as it splashed up on the hood.  Somehow we survived.

I've changed every year, especially over this past one it seems.  This returning, this coming "home" - it grounds me, reminds me who I've always been, Who's always been there.

He's traveled with me every year, guarding my path, healing my spirit.  Sometimes I've needed this coming home more than others, this year perhaps being one of them.

" "...Return to Me, and I will return to you," says the Lord of hosts.  But you say "How shall we return?" " (Malachi 3:7)

That verse haunts me quite a bit.  It's like I hear the voice of God Himself - "Why are you always running away from Me?  Don't you know I'm the only answer?"

I'll confess it flat out - when my faith is challenged, I retreat to my own corner. It's like I forget Who He is, what He's done, that He sees me where I am.

More often than not, I'm looking for answers within myself.  It's like I believe I'm alone in this.

But I'm not.  This is the way I am.  I don't want to be this way.  I don't want to keep running away and trying to do it all on my own - because that's so, so unnecessary.

But even my runaway of a heart - it doesn't scare Him off.  Nothing can separate me from the love of the One Who carved my name onto His heart before the ages began.

Slowly, slowly He is working a change in me.  That is one of many reasons I am grateful for this blog - I am able to look back and see even week to week how I'm changing.
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Now we've left the beach, and I've had a few hours in the car to think over it all.

I believe that more than anything, this trip taught me the importance of breathing - not just physically but spiritually.

I need to breathe.  I need to focus on feeding my soul.  In a race of a world where "productivity" is key - we've forgotten that in order to pour ourselves out to our people - we need to have something to pour out.  You can't satisfy anyone's thirst with a dry cup.  You'll never get anywhere with your tank reading "empty".

Less distractions, less junk, less "yes" to things I can't do, less "stuff".

More simpleness.  More soulful, purpose-driven living.  More of my Jesus.

"For I decided to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ and Him crucified." (1 Cor. 2:2)

Just Jesus Christ.  Just the knowledge of what His resurrection attained for us - it's all we need to know.  It's all we need to have.  "...Look for Christ and you will find Him; and with Him, everything else thrown in." (C. S. Lewis)

Breathe.

There is only one thing, one Person you need to be certain of.